There is one saying according to which there is no nation without shed blood and no love without shed tears. Some analyses use to insist on the fact that healthy relationships should be harmonious and creative. Still, passionate affairs are always the opposite. They seem to be so counterproductive, full of conflicts and disputes. And they oscillate between hate and love.
This can be exhaustive, but it is still typical. Surely, if you have to deal with a systematically abusive or conspicuously aggressive partner, you immediately have to consult a psychologist so that you release yourself from a toxic and harmful relationship. Yet, along general lines, a love affair without tensions is generally considered as tedious and without challenge.
Why is it so? A usual explanation is that we are intrigued by the challenge of conquering another person. Any difficulty increases the fascination of the love game.
Yet, a complex relationship with what appears to be full of unsurmountable obstacles could be something more than that. Interestingly, strong people tend to attract hard and turmoiled affairs.
There may be a spiritual background for our proclivity towards hard love affairs. The explanations include the ones below.
Difficult partners mirror our personality
The opposites attract each other but, often, beyond a superficial controversy, there may exist an underlying similarity. This can be a positive factor for an erotic liaison. Still, in some cases it can be annoying, since it brings us in front of our own weaknesses and flaws. Two egoists or unreliable partners will have a hard time loving each other. Once realized, one should regard the relationship as a chance to confront their one dark sides and surpass it. See a difficult partner that you really love as a gift of the universe and work together to overcome your flaws.
A Carmic Lesson
Some relationships cause us wounds from which however we want to sustain and go through. What seems a “masochistic capriccio” is sometimes a destiny for cleaning our Carma. Two persons may come together because their love is a reincarnated one and their souls meet again to solve their issues. Or, there is a psychic bond that brings two people in a love affair and their encounter is a lesson for both that will eventually lead to their self-improvement and a deeper connection. This may not be obvious at the beginning, but gradually the tension will lead to the development of both parts.
Antithesis & Synthesis
The German Philosopher Hegel referred to a creative “dialectic”, that means a meeting of arguments. At a first stage, the two theories or ideologies (or nations and classes) clash against each other, in peace or in war. But, through this conflict, this antithesis, something new will emerge that combines elements of both previous tendencies. This will be a synthesis. This can also happen with a couple. Two totally distinct characters will confront each other initially. Nevertheless, a passionate love can be like a stage of war. And as the Ancient Greek Philosopher Heraklitus wrote: “War is the Father of Everything”.
Love is besides a battlefield, right?
So, unless you are really object of an affair that is obviously unbalanced, miserable or toxic, do not hesitate to select a partner that will challenge your intellect and your emotional and spiritual world. And even if a relationship cannot go on, you have been taught a useful lesson for the future.